And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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