I need help removing her.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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