big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
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