Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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