I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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