Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
