the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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