I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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