just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
