how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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