Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I love having hate sex.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize