We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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