Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
This baby is an asshole
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize
