we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
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You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
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I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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