I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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