some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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