thus making me awesome and them whores
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
