She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
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Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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