we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
