Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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