i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
