did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize