I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
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