sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
