so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
