the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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