you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
