so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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