Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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