dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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