is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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