if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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