when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
