i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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