Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
