I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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