they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Randomize