apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
