i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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