so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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