My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
