i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
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