I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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