My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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