oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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