Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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