I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
