Texts From Last Night

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  (503): View more from Oregon

  Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum

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  (503): Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum http://tfl.nu/wrcg
  Replies (26) Good night (4596) Bad night (549)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.

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  (757): My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed. http://tfl.nu/rjig
  Replies (28) Good night (665) Bad night (5099)
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  (661): View more from California

  May God have mercy on my new vibrator.

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  (661): May God have mercy on my new vibrator. http://tfl.nu/qino
  Replies (98) Good night (8503) Bad night (1036)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.

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  (404): Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it. http://tfl.nu/akrg
  Replies (16) Good night (5801) Bad night (1124)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.

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  (270): Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience. http://tfl.nu/d64j
  Replies (3) Good night (4058) Bad night (816)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...

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  (410): He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone... http://tfl.nu/g061
  Replies (15) Good night (1454) Bad night (5932)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.

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  (803): She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD. http://tfl.nu/b7tw
  Replies (13) Good night (1344) Bad night (3011)
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  (716): View more from New York

  Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.

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  (716): Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door. http://tfl.nu/u06r
  Replies (10) Good night (899) Bad night (2809)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.

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  (512): In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian. http://tfl.nu/ew8b
  Replies (7) Good night (2398) Bad night (917)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.

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  (832): No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good. http://tfl.nu/yaqd
  Replies (3) Good night (748) Bad night (1202)
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.

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  (862): Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good. http://tfl.nu/j3wb
  Replies (6) Good night (2496) Bad night (920)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified

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  (812): She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified http://tfl.nu/xfst
  Replies (9) Good night (1329) Bad night (724)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.

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  (412): I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass. http://tfl.nu/ocdo
  Replies (7) Good night (821) Bad night (623)
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  (760): View more from California

  I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.

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  (760): I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard. http://tfl.nu/86r6
  Replies (19) Good night (1442) Bad night (537)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.

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  (520): He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down. http://tfl.nu/0sgk
  Replies (3) Good night (435) Bad night (279)

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