apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high