I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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