Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize