so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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